A Lesson In Loving Yourself

I am at the point in my life now where I love myself. Not only a couple years ago, that was a different story. I had such low-self esteem, I was diagnosed “Clinically Depressed”. And this, “Mental Illness” was one of the things that led to me hitting rock bottom in college. I had lost my sense of self. I had lost motivation, passion, and overall interest in myself and life. For anyone who has struggled with depression, then you know of the crippling torment it is to feel practically nothing…to feel so numb. To carry this weight of a heart around buried inside of you while you try and go about your day. It was a daily struggle.

One of the many things that helped me get to where I am today is building my self-esteem. I was told by numerous people, that I was a great person. That I was loved. That people cared about me. They told me all these wonderful things, but I didn’t believe a word of it, because I didn’t believe in myself. While these other people reminded me how great of a person I am, I needed to remind myself. That is why every day, I thought of three things I liked about myself. At first, coming up with three things was a challenge. Three? Are you kidding me?! I started off with basic qualities that people have told me I was: I am smart. I am creative. Even though I didn’t believe them for myself at first, I backed up these statements with facts. I am smart because I made the Dean’s List at School. I am creative because I have the poetry and artwork to prove it. Over time, I started to believe these things, that I was smart. That I was kind. I started expanding three things I liked about myself to five and even ten. I kept discovering more and more things that I liked about myself: My interest in culture, my love for moustaches. Wanting to keep track of my findings, I created a running list of everything I liked about myself. Since I am creative, I made it into a poster board that I keep in my room. Whenever I am feeling low about myself or think of a new reason to love me, I have the list right there, ready to go. Currently I have over a hundred reasons why I love myself. All unique, just like me! And it keeps growing. To think there was a time in my life where I couldn’t even come up with three reasons…

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